Super vegan
Non-GMO, sugar free raw until 3 vegan
Super duper vegan
Points out your food choice flaw vegan
Hopped up on gluten vegan?
Gluten free mother fucker right here vegan
High carb no fat vegan
Tsk tsk no poo vegan
Super quadruple amazing vegan
Boycott non vegan companies vegan
Super wow y’all can’t touch this vegan
Tofurky is evil vegan
Vegan AF vegan
Wanna marry & have tons of kids vegan
Super awesome hella vegan
Immaculate shit on a cistern vegan
Eats out at non vegan eateries vegan
Remains judgmental to your groceries list vegan
Super duper kingly vegan
Goddamn mega, epic fantastical being vegan
Above reproach vegan
All hail the almighty vegan
You eat what I eat or you ain’t a vegan vegan
Vegans can be hypocrites too vegan
Don’t forget that vegan

Holy shit! vegan
I’m vegan
A vegan
Fucking vegan
Asshole vegan
Vegan

 

…I don’t give an ounce of fuck what y’all eat as long as it didn’t come from an animal.
I ain’t Judgy McJudger about vegan food…
If you are vegan, almost vegan, or considering vegan…& y’all encounter one of ‘those vegans’…just fucking ignore them.
They’re full of shit & they polish their turds.
Don’t waste your time.
Don’t be bullied.
Wanna eat vegan food that contains preservatives?
Eat em…it’s still vegan.
Wanna eat an accidentally vegan food from a non-vegan company?
Eat it…it’s still vegan.
Wanna buy Ben & Jerry’s non-dairy ice cream even tho they’re not a vegan company?
Buy it…it’s still vegan.
Wanna have a family?
Adopt children, plenty of them out there in need of families. And, the planet is already overpopulated. Odd that these super vegans wanna get knocked up/knock someone up.
Wanna shampoo your tresses?
Go for it…there are tons of cruelty free products out there. Going ‘no poo’ does not equate to veganism.

Thing is…all this pitchfork style food company boycotting doesn’t move anything forward.
Non vegan companies that offer vegan products should be purchased, thus encouraging more products to follow….
More demand, man.

Besides, let’s be honest…vegans are still merely humans. They suck outta the gate…granted, less suckage than animal eaters…but, still…

Any vegan that runs their mouth about a fucking tofu pup not being vegan cos it is counterpart to a hot dog…you got the go ahead to tell them to shove their head up their feces-free ass.

Do the least amount of harm.

&

Sell your soul to seitan!

Dig Out Your Soul