My month of hell hath begun

OMFG.  What have I done?

A Big Mac here, a Hot Dog there….give me a gun!

[not sure I can make it in the long run]

There’s simply nothing for me to eat! Food? None!

Sigh… look at all the meat ‘n cheese being eaten by everyone

Deep dish, extra cheese pepperoni pizza….I’ll be undone!

My cravings are intense! I’ll eat an egg outta a chickens ass for fun!

Week 2–

…omfg…being vegan is nothing I should have to go through

I ain’t some bunny-hugging, tofu-thumping extremist guru

The break room they were discussing BBQ… [wtf am I gonna do?]

I miss my lunchtime ham ‘n cheese sandwich tried & true

I miss grinding my molars on fibrous tissue

I’m starving, and have no energy, too.

I feel like total shit because of vegan, it’s true.

It’s only the second week… how the hell will I pull through?

Week 3–

OK, so I’d forgotten about bananas, spinach, nuts, & zucchini

…it’s like they weren’t even really ‘foods’ to me

I now freshly prepare my own meals regularly

And, I’m shitting like a gold-medalist shitter daily

And, my skin cleared right up, & is no longer oily

And, my energy came back, & goddamn doubled, admittedly

I suppose, my body was just adjusting accordingly

I have literally never felt better, physically

[ok, ok, so I came into this ‘vegan for 30 days’ challenge thing rigidly]

Week 4–

Before vegan for a month I shopped in the frozen section of the grocery store

Before vegan for a month I had no idea what a goddamn eggplant was for

Weight loss, healthy skin, abundant energy- what more could you ask for??

…..going out to eat with my friends….that’s what more I could ask for

So, for me, no vegan encore

Instead, I’ll pay for gore

I’ll ignore

Cos, like my friends-